Monday, 15 June 2015
27 Things That REALLY Grind My Gears
1) Limp handshakes. Unless your hand is broken there is no excuse. At all.
2) That squeeky rubbery feeling of the dishes as soon as they come out of the dishwasher.
3) When people hold their knife like a pen whilst eating.
4) Eating with your mouth open. This is so basic yet such a struggle for some.
5) People that walk really slowly when you're running really late and it makes you REALLY angry.
6) Those that insist they would OF done something. Fibber. You would HAVE done something. Get it right.
7) People that change lanes without indicating. It's that little stick only an inch away from your bloomin finger. Cummon people.
8) Parents that let their children bring their iPads to dinner at a restaurant. Our future generation will forever lose the art of conversation...
9) Not being able to find the start of the sellotape. It really shouldn't be this challenging.
10) Lazy people that throw their cigarette butts on the pavement. SMOKE IT IN. FIND A BIN. That's what I say.
11) Paying for public toilets to find them smelly, skiddy and with a lack of toilet roll. I paid 30P for this. 30 ACTUAL P.
12) People that park in Disabled spaces. So you want their parking space. Do you want their disability too? Nah didn't think so...
13) Facebook statuses that use absolutely no grammar or punctuation and it really annoys me does it annoy you too yeah coz I didnt wanna understand your status anyway coz nobody got time for that do you know what I mean yeah coz I totally get that babes
14) Having a delicious lunch at someones house. You go to use their toilet and find they have zero trace of hand wash soap in their toilet. Ew. Ew. Ew.
15) Feeling the social pressure to tip a distinctly average waiter to discover the bill INCLUDED service charge. Read the small print people.
16) Having to show your bloody boarding pass every time you buy something at the airport. No, I don't remember my flight number. All I want is some Goddam Immodium.
17) Spending an eternity at the petrol pump waving your arms like a complete lunatic for the petrol service man to FINALLY spot you. 20 minutes later...
18) Paying £3.75 for an undrinkable coffee. Babes, you've been making coffee all day. HOW can you suddenly make an incredibly MILKY and COLD coffee as soon as I come in. DON'T YOU KNOW HOW MUCH I WAS LOOKING FORWARD TO THIS MOMENT?
19) Dear Hotel. If I wanted a shot glass worth of Orange Juice with my breakfast buffet I would have requested it. This is not the War. Why must we be on rations...
20) Trying to save the planet by using energy saving lightbulbs. Then having to sit in darkness for three hours until the light bulb actually gives off light. Splendid.
21) When you've just got very comfy on the sofa and realise the remote control has VANISHED. Then having to psych yourself up for that hideous three second walk towards the TV to manually change the channel. Life is a struggle.
22) "Ring ring. Ring ring.
You're entitled to PPI..."
YOU'VE JUST RUINED MY LIFE FOR THE EIGHTH TIME TODAY.
23) When your dishwasher decides to HALF CLEAN your dishes. Oh good. I really wanted to use a plate with dried up crusty avocado from three days ago.
24) Having to insert £1 for the privilege of loaning a battered supermarket trolley. Why does this still exist? No one actually wants to KEEP your trolley.
25) "Does anybody have an iPhone charger?"
"Yep, I've got one! iPhone 5 yeah?"
"Yeah it's at home"
26) People that clap when the plane successfully lands. No. Please no.
27) Asking someone to kindly take a picture for you. It's fuzzy, out of focus and totally shit. And they only took ONE. Super.
I know it's all harmful stuff and in the grand scheme of things none of this is really THAT annoying but I hope you can relate to at least a few of the above. I really enjoyed brainstorming for this blog. If you have any more I may have missed out please drop me a comment and let me know!
P.S - If you're reading this and you're a limp handshaker, disabled space parker, plane clapper and a PPI seller I am totes sorry if this offends you...
Thank you so much for reading and I'll see you in my next bloggy :)
Click here for my 'Things I Wish I Told My Younger Self' blog post if you're looking for any more relatable stuff. Hope you enjoy :)